I hate nights like tonight.
It was a hard day. This medication garbage is really messing with me.
Husband wasn’t in a place to carry me.
I was starting to breathe, but I needed a few moments with Husband. 
He fell asleep.
Now I’m wide awake- suffocating- wondering- needing him.
But he’ll just be uber pissed off if I wake him.
So I sit.
I swallow.
I breathe in.
I breathe out.
What next?