he took one, deep look into my eyes & – he knew! sounds like an entry in a bad bromance novel but it’s not – it’s my life. MNJ here, i had a disconcerting experience friday that i’m wondering if anyone out there has further details for. i’ll try to keep the intro as short as possible so as not to bore.
so, about a week and a half ago i started getting this small flash of light in the corner of my left eye. called the opthamologist for a check up. sat down in his chair & he starts the exam. what he finds distresses him a bit cause he’s not quite sure what he’s seeing. he thinks it might be a freckle on the inside of my eye, something that i’ve always had and that the flash has always been there but i’m just starting to see because it’s gotten more intense. he happened to be facilitating a seminar with a bunch of regional doc’s at his office so he asked if i cared to have another opinion. sure, bring it on. the second doc sits down and starts his exam. confirms that it is in fact a “freckle” but keeps probing.
here’s where i get lost & need more insight – the second doc point blank asks me what my sexual preference is. a bit taken aback but i said “well, i’m married but i’ll be honest, i’m gay.” to which he asks, “have you been tested for HIV?”
me: “yes, i’ve been tested twice, about fifteen years ago.”
doc: “you might want to get tested again. does your wife know your gay?”
me: “yes, she know before we got married. but wait a minute, what’s going on here? why would you ask such a question?”
this is where my mind goes blank while the two of them talk doc talk & use big words that on a good day i wouldn’t understand. apparently there is something called CMV, traces of your body being overloaded with viral infection that can manifest itself in the tissue of the eye that is consistent with people carrying the HIV virus. CMV is not ONLY related to HIV but he has seen many cases in his practice that link back to it. they don’t seem too alarmed but proceed to tell me of a study on a product called propolis – some kind of bee extract that has been proven to cure HIV. they even went to the computer, looked up an article, printed it off to send home with me.
this was friday morning. in shock, we decided to move forward with our weekend plans; dropping the kids at a sitter & heading to nashville for carmina burana & music city half marathon. we have had no time to research or dig or even go get a test. i’m not sure what to think or where to turn.
the whole experience was like watching a talk by elder scott at conference. you know what i’m talking about, even though you are sitting all cozy on your sofa at home in your PJ’s, when he looks at the camera, you know he’s looking through the lens directly into your soul!
does anyone out there know anything regarding this connection? if not, we’ll keep digging and keep you posted. UGH! i hate when the past comes back to bite you. they always say that the eyes are a passageway into the soul . . .