So I think I’m on to something with this coffee house Women’s Conference idea. Husband had some studying to do, so we got a babysitter and went on a date to the Cafe for a tasty treat and some quiet time. We got settled in with our yums and beverages and had a most enjoyable night. For those of you keeping score, Husband had a peppermint steamer (steamed milk and peppermint syrup) and I had a peppermint (herbal) tea. It was rounded out with a chocolate layer cake and pumpkin roll. Nothing caffeinated (overly) or alcholic.
Conference itself was delightful. As skeptical and jaded as I am, I cannot ever see the prophet- any prophet- walk into the Conference Center without feeling the Spirit. I haven’t ever had a great affinity for President Monson. He is a wonderful man, he has a great love in his heart, but I lean toward the more practical type. I don’t particularly respond to flowery poetry, I want to get down to business. BUT I know he is a man of God.
Sister Beck, on the other hand, is my kind of girl. She got right down to business. I commented to Husband that it is nice that the women don’t ever get into the sticky stuff. But then again, maybe it would be better if they did. There might be more understanding and love if the heavy doctrinal issues were handled through the Relief Society. Just my thought.
It was not by coincidence that our ward Visiting Teaching conference was held yesterday. I had been considering being taken off the VT list altogether. I don’t want to be VT’d, nor do I want to VT. Husband and I have both been feeling bombarded and quite overwhelmed and frankly, pissed off by the amount of “pressure to perform” in the Church. Is it so wrong to stop doing all that crap for a while? One can never do enough. There is always more, and there is no way to NOT fall short. Yes, I know- we do our best, and Christ will compensate for the rest. But isn’t there a time that just living my life and being a good mom and wife is enough? I’m tired. I’m tired of the responsibility of caring for everyone around me. I know that my VT’s don’t really want to come- that it is a burden on their lives to spend time in my living room chatting and sharing the message with me. So why make them?
My RS Pres. is an amazing woman. Truly an amazing woman. I respect her more than I respect a lot of people. That isn’t an easy thing to do- to earn that sort of respect from me. I don’t want to give her any more grief by issuing this request to her. I also don’t want to get into the discussion that will certainly follow. AND, I’m not sure I should make such a request. I’ve been told my entire life that this is God’s program, and it is my responsibility as His faithful child to do it, to help Him in His work.
I love God. I love my Savior. I need their help in my life. I know that by turning myself outward I will find healing, I will find God.
I have three kids and a gay husband. I think there is very little room for “me” as it is.
I love this Gospel. I don’t love this Church. Well, I don’t love ALL of it. It is my home, but sometimes homes are dysfunctional.
We vote for Coffe House Church. Who will speak next week?