Understanding and Acceptance

A wise man once said that only by understanding something can we come to accept it.

I understand that my husband is gay.  I accept that he is gay.

I understand that I’m not gay.  I accept that I’m not gay.

I understand that I am madly, passionately, devastatingly in love with husband, and I accept that I am madly, passionately, devastatingly in love with husband.

I understand that husband is deeply in love with me.  I accept that he is deeply in love with me.  (only recently though)

I understand that he is sexually attracted to men.  I accept that he is sexually attracted to men.

I understand that he is not sexually attracted to me.  I do not accept that he is not sexually attracted to me.

I understand that his lack of sexual attraction does not mean that he does not find me attractive, and I accept that his lack of sexual attraction does not mean that he does not find me attractive.

I understand that he has stepped out of our marriage to fulfill his sexual attractions.  I accept that he has stepped out of our marriage to fulfill his sexual attractions.  (I don’t condone the behavior though!!)

I don’t understand how other gay people, married to heteros, find satisfaction within the bonds of marriage.  I don’t accept that they do.  (Please, Please prove me wrong!!!)

I understand that God created us, and I accept that God created us.

I understand that a man and a woman have to have sexual intercourse to produce children, and I accept that a man and a woman have to have sexual intercourse to produce children.

I understand that each of us was created to be different from one another, and I accept that each of us was created to be different from one another.

I understand that agency is the key to the purpose of this mortal sojourn, and I accept that.

I understand the theory that a person should be able to love and act upon that love for another person of their same gender.  I do not accept that theory.

HOWEVER.  I also do not understand how God could create loving wonderful person, give them attractions and desires and then tell them that acting on those attractions and desires would be evil.

I understand that my opinion would, to some, make me a bigot, and I accept that.

Oh, and one more thing.  Husband is a really beautiful, understanding and kind man with a huge heart.  He goes out of his way every day to make sure I’m okay.  He is a fantastic father.  He plays with the kids, reads to them, and shares 100% of the parenting with me (except poopy diapers.)  If I’m not careful, I easily begin to think that we are quite possibly the perfect couple.

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